From the very first moment you behold the precious miracle that is your newborn child, there's a chain that instantly connects from your heart to that child.

You marvel in their beauty and perfection and you wonder how something so magnificent could have come from inside you.The love you feel for that tiny life is so strong that it makes you weep with joy and pride.As they grow, they become the thread that holds you together and the reason you get up in the morning (and multiple times throughout the night.)When they smile, you beam.When they hurt, you hurt more.When they're small, you're able to mend boo-boos, hurt feelings and life's lemons with a hug and a kiss and sometimes ice cream.You valiantly slay the monsters lurking under the bed and hiding in the closet.You do your best to fill them with knowledge and wisdom that will not only help them to succeed in life, but help keep them from harm.All too quickly, however, everything changes.You blink, and you're waving them off on their first day of kindergarten.You put on a big smile and try to hide your tears because you know that the journey to separation has begun.You blink again, and they're graduating high school and off to start their new lives as adults.For them, the chain is broken; for you, it lingers on.You watch from the proverbial bleachers as they traverse through life, remembering the various positions you've held over the years; first as a player and then as a coach.Now you are only spectator.It can be very difficult to come to terms with that realization because that unseen chain grows longer and often heavier after they have left the family home.You see, you never stop being a parent.For you, those feelings and that role never changes.If things are smooth sailing for your adult child, your spectator role is much easier to accept.If your child is constantly navigating rough waters, your role in their life becomes painfully blurred.You find yourself wanting to kiss boo-boos that aren't easily mended, offer wisdom that is neither asked for nor desired, and slay monsters that your child has invited into their lives through their own actions.Monsters that they often can't even see.It's bad enough to watch your children struggle and experience great pain when circumstances are beyond their control, but when they bring it on themselves, over and over again, you end up juggling a myriad of thoughts and emotions that leave you longing to crawl onto the lap and into the arms of your own parents and seek solace from the storms.You want them to hug and kiss the pain away and say the words that come from many years of life experience that will somehow make everything OK; because you have already drowned your sorrows in a pint of Ben & Jerry's.You bang your head against that blasted chain and sometimes, you think it would be easier to just cut it off; but you know that you can't.And then, somewhere out of the fog, a hint of light peeks through and things begin to become just a little bit clearer.You look at that chain that has been connected to your heart from that very first day and see it in a whole new way.Suddenly, it feels somewhat lighter now that it has found a new purpose.You pick it up and hold it in your hands; it feels strange and yet familiar all at the same time and you finally know exactly what to do.With every ounce of strength you have left, you toss that lifeline to your child across the raging seas, across every barrier, real and perceived: And then, you wait, and pray for them to pick it up; because you finally accept that that is all you can do.