Kids hate math for different reasons. Some find it too hard, others find it overwhelming, and still others are so bored they can hardly bring themselves to complete their assignments.

Whatever the reason, nothing ruins a day (and mom’s nerves) like fighting about math. The arguing, whining, and crying spill over beyond math time and make the whole day miserable.

Quick fixes like rewards and sticker charts sometimes make math bearable for a few days. But, before long, the battles begin all over again.

Not all kids are going to adore math, but if it’s a never-ending struggle, these strategies will help make math time more tolerable — for both you and your child. Try some this summer and get a jump on next school year.

Find the Goldilocks challenge level

Think about a time when you were deeply engaged in learning: it may have been learning how to crochet or mastering a piece on the piano. Whatever it was, one of the reasons you likely found it so satisfying was that you were working at your Goldilocks challenge level: not too easy, not too hard but just right.

Finding the right level of challenge is key to helping kids enjoy math, too. There’s no satisfaction in whizzing through easy busywork problems, but it’s frustrating to plug away at problems that are too hard.

Here are some ways to find the Goldilocks level for your child:

1. Do fewer problems

. If a child is exhausted or overwhelmed by the length of their assignments, shorten them. Skip problems that are too easy, work on just the odds or evens, or pick the problems that your child most needs to work on.

2. Do more practice and review.

While some kids need to do fewer problems in order to not hate math, others may need to do more. If your child is having trouble retaining what he’s already learned, make sure those skills are sharp before moving on.

Every step in math builds on each other, and it’s frustrating to kids to keep moving forward when they’re missing some of the building blocks. Make sure a child has the math facts mastered and basic skills solid before you move onto more complex work.

3. Set a timer

. If your child has a short attention span, but needs a lot of practice, make math less difficult by breaking assignments into smaller chunks. Set a timer and ask your child to do quality work for a short time. Kids are often amazed at how much they can get done when they just put their head down and get to work for 15 minutes. Keep your expectations realistic, especially for little ones: kindergartners and first-graders often can only focus on for five to 10 minutes at a time.

4. Require less writing.

Actual physical pain makes anything a lot less enjoyable. Younger children who have already done writing, spelling, and copywork may not have the stamina left for copying problems from a textbook or writing out many answers. If your child has trouble with this, don’t require them to copy from a textbook. Or, allow them to answer as many problems orally as possible.

Another way to make writi

ng less arduous is to solve problems together on a mini whiteboard first. It’s much easier for kids to write on a whiteboard than with a pencil on paper, since they don’t have to concentrate so much on keeping their numbers neat and properly sized.

5. Model a positive attitude.

If you don’t like math yourself, it can be hard to fake a positive attitude. But we parents set the tone for our homes. When we’re dragging, everyone’s dragging. When we’re energized and positive, the kids are much more likely to be, too.

Don’t talk negatively about math, and try to put a smile on your face when you announce that it’s math time. A little bit of positivity can go a long way.

6. Teach, don’t just assign.

There are two huge drawbacks to sending your kids off to work on math by themselves.

First, kids associate math with banishment and not getting mom or dad’s attention until they have a problem. This makes some kids more likely to act up. And for our extroverted kids, it’s hard for them to like a subject that they always have to do by themselves.

Second, when kids do math on their own, they’re often able to limp along and get most answers right. But are they really reading the lesson, thinking it through, and internalizing it?

Unless you have a very studious and responsible student, a child who does math on her own is usually missing out on the deeper understanding that comes from working through the lesson with a parent. Mentoring your independent math learner doesn’t have to take a long time. Even five minutes will go a long way to help your child feel supported and encouraged.

7. Use a teacher’s guide

. Teacher’s guides are a wealth of useful information. Most will help you understand the main objective of the lesson and show you some ways to demonstrate the concept. Some provide games and activities to reinforce what your child is learning and add some fun to math time. Even if you don’t do every activity, they’ll help you teach math well.

8. Grow your own skills

. You don’t have to be a math whiz to help your child with math, but it’s hard to guide what we don’t understand ourselves. If math was always a difficult subject for you, there are a ton of good resources out there to help you learn to teach math with confidence.

9. Help your child feel a sense of accomplishment

. Helping your child feel a sense of accomplishment in math prevents the daily homework struggle from feeling like unending drudgery.

Teach your child how to do math and why it works

It feels good to get answers right, but working through procedures you don’t understand — over and over, day in and day out — doesn’t provide much of a feeling of satisfaction. Kids enjoy learning math more when they understand what they’re doing and get to have those satisfying aha-moments when a concept suddenly clicks.

Encourage your child to think about what she’s doing and why. Help her see the connections between what she’s learning and what she already knows. And use manipulatives to help make new concepts concrete and visual.

10. Go over completed assignments together.

Make time to go over completed assignments together. Notice the correct answers first, then analyze the incorrect answers with your child. Ask your child to correct any careless mistakes and work together on any problems they had trouble with. If you discover they didn’t understand the concept, make a note to tackle it again the next day.

Looking over the work together helps your child feel ownership of his learning and a greater sense of responsibility. This is especially important for math-anxious kids: knowing that it’s OK to make mistakes can help them take a deep breath and relax as they do their math assignments, without the pressure to be perfect.

11. Celebrate your child’s progress.

When your child finishes a unit, go back through the unit and talk about the new skills she has mastered. When you’re working on math facts, make a chart of the facts she needs to learn and have her cross off the ones that she has down pat. And when she accomplishes something especially hard, like mastering the subtraction facts or long division, do something fun to celebrate!

There you have it: Simple ways to help make math more tolerable for your math-hating child. Pick one or two and give them a try. I hope they’ll make math a more satisfying learning experience for your child — and stop the daydreaming, tears, and tantrums as well!

Kate Snow is an author and math educator on a mission to help parents raise kids who are capable and confident in math.