By BOB URBAN

rurban@tnonline.comBack when I was a youngster, my father drove a 1947 Buick, a big, dark green Roadmaster that if it had a gun turret attached to it could pass for a Sherman tank (something my father also drove during the Battle of the Bulge).That Buick came equipped with Dynaflow (no more stick shift), and wide white-walled tires that we scrubbed with Bon Ami cleanser to keep them lily white.We had a lot of great memories in that two-door beast. Vacations were always an adventure because Dad would attach my younger brother's playpen to the roof with straps, and fill it with everything from fishing rods to an old Coca Cola heavy metal beverage cooler. We looked more like gypsies than campers as we made our way to Lake Wallenpaupack every July.At a time when I was just learning to read and to observe things, one item stands out as one of my favorites when I sat in the back seat of the road monster the Burma Shave signs that adorned almost every two-lane highway we ever traveled. They all had a message.I hadn't thought of those ads for years until a loyal reader sent the following along recently. See if it brings back memories. If it doesn't you're too young. If it does rekindle some memories you're older than dirt.See what I mean.For those who never saw any of the Burma Shave signs, here is a quick history lesson of the 1930s and '40s.Before there were interstates, when everyone drove the old two lane roads, Burma Shave signs would be posted all over the countryside in farmers' fields.They were small red signs with white letters.Five signs, About 100 feet apart, each containing one line of a four line couplet......and the obligatory 5th sign advertising BurmaShave, a popular shaving cream.Here are some of the actual signs:DON'T STICK YOUR ELBOWOUT SO FARIT MAY GO HOMEIN ANOTHER CAR.BURMA SHAVETRAINS DON'T WANDERALL OVER THE MAP'CAUSE NOBODY SITSIN THE ENGINEER'S LAPBurmaShaveSHE KISSED THE HAIRBRUSHBY MISTAKESHE THOUGHT IT WASHER HUSBAND JAKEBurmaShaveDON'T LOSE YOUR HEADTO GAIN A MINUTEYOU NEED YOUR HEADYOUR BRAINS ARE IN ITBurmaShaveDROVE TOO LONGDRIVER SNOOZINGWHAT HAPPENED NEXTIS NOT AMUSINGBurmaShaveBROTHER SPEEDERLET'S REHEARSEALL TOGETHERGOOD MORNING, NURSEBurmaShaveCAUTIOUS RIDERTO HER RECKLESS DEARLET'S HAVE LESS BULLAND A LITTLE MORE STEERBurmaShaveSPEED WAS HIGHWEATHER WAS HOTTIRES WERE THINX MARKS THE SPOTBurmaShaveTHE MIDNIGHT RIDEOF PAUL FOR BEERLED TO A WARMERHEMISPHEREBurmaShaveAROUND THE CURVELICKETY-SPLITBEAUTIFUL CARWASN'T IT?BurmaShaveNO MATTER THE PRICENO MATTER HOW NEWTHE BEST SAFETY DEVICEIN THE CAR IS YOUBurmaShaveA GUY WHO DRIVESA CAR WIDE OPENIS NOT THINKIN'HE'S JUST HOPIN'BurmaShave