A few months ago, my girlfriend and I visited her 95-year-old father, who lives in Linglestown.

He’s a fascinating man with a Grand Canyon full of interesting memories that date back to his first decade of the nine and a half decades that he has lived so far.

While traveling down Yesterday Road, he stopped in mid-sentence and said, “You would think that by now in my life, my brain would be full, and I’d have no room for anything else.”

That comment fueled this column. I decided to be a creative as I could possibly be. Let’s pretend the time is the near future and another 95-year-old man walks into a high-tech store hoping to have someone help him with a problem.

Tech: What can I help you with today, sir?

Man: My brain is full. I looked in the mirror this morning and my eyes flashed the words: “No more storage.” I have no more room left in my mind and I have too much to remember. I have no family or friends left. They’re all gone.

Tech: I understand. I can help you free up some space in your brain, but to do that we’ll have to delete some of your memories.

Man: How does this work?

Tech: First, let’s plug you in. (He takes out a USB cord and plugs one end into the man’s port that had been implanted into the back of his neck and the other end into a computer screen.) OK, now sir. What’s the password that opens your mind?

Man: Password? I don’t remember.

Tech: (clicking onto the “forgot your password” icon.) We’ll have to make a new one. You’ll need at least 15 characters, three capital letters, but not in a row, two special characters, one in the beginning and one at the end, no part of the password can include any part of your name or anyone else’s name in your family, and that includes your dog or other pet if you have one. (Ten minutes later the password, ‘#MybrainHasnorooMleft* opens up the man’s mind bank that displays a long list of memories upon the computer screen.)

Man: Now what?

Tech: We’ll go down your list of memories and delete the ones you don’t want anymore to free up some space. How about this one? When you were in third grade, you put bubble gum in Sally Smith’s hair and you blamed it on Arnold, the kid sitting next to you. He got in trouble and you didn’t.

Man: Nah, let’s keep that one because it still makes me laugh. And besides, Arnold got me back when he sucker-punched me on the playground the next day.

Tech: (points to the screen) Eighth grade — you’re in the woods in the back of your house with a Suzie somebody and she locked lips with you, your first real kiss.

Man: No! I mean yes. I want to keep that one. You know, the first time for anything is a golden memory.

Tech: How about we try to delete a few of your not so good memories (scrolling the screen). Here’s one. You got cut from your high school baseball team during tryouts. Now, that’s one you gotta let go.

Man: Oh, no. I tell that story all the time. The following year I not only made the team, but I was also selected to the All-Star team.

Tech: Here’s another one. Your wife died from cancer. Your son died from an overdose and your best friend is in the hospital with Alzheimer’s.

Man: You’d never think a man my age would have any tears left from all the crying I’ve done. Keep them all. The pain will never go away anyway.

Tech: Then there’s only one thing we can do.

Man: What’s that?

Tech: Our special today for only $799.99 can buy you more storage. We just pop you a pill and your brain will grow a few extra inches.

Man: What are the side effects?

Tech: Let’s see (reading the bottle). Your head might grow larger. Bleeding from your ears. Convulsive stuttering. Temporary blindness. Not too bad.

Man: I think I saw this advertised on TV and this old woman was happy that she remembered sucking her thumb when she was 4 years old. Let’s do this!

Tech: Here you go. (Man pops the pill. The tech stares down at the bottle) Oh, no! This is the wrong bottle! These pills delete all your memory!

Man: Where am I? (looks at the tech) Who are you?

Tech: I’m … never mind. I’ve got to find the Auto Memory Recovery meds.

Man: Why?

Tech: Because you won’t remember anything, not even who you are. Your brain will be that of an infant child. You have no memories yet.

The man walks immediately out of the building against the protests of the tech. He sees children playing in the park and he laughs. He bends down and inhales the fragrance of a wildflower. He feels joy. Life is new. So much to experience. Suddenly Tech runs to him and grabs his arm.

Tech: (gasping for breath and holding two bottles of pills in his hands) Look, I gave you this pill that deleted all your memory and now you need to take this pill to recover everything you lost. The only side effect is a possible tumor growing out of your forehead. Not too bad.

Man: (turning his head from Tech and pointing to the sky) Look! What’s that up there?

Tech looked up. His chuckle became a belly laugh. He opened one of the bottles and popped a “Delete Memory” pill into his mouth.

Minutes later, people were using their cellphones to make videos of the old man and the tech down by a lake jumping barefoot into mud puddles on the shore and skipping stones across the surface of the water.

Email Rich Strack at richiesadie11@gmail.com