By Pattie Mihalik

newsgirl@comcast.net

It’s easy to live life when things are going smoothly. But it’s how we play a bad hand that’s the true test of character.

At 62, Randy Oates was given a bad hand — just when life was better than ever.

Although he was never much of an athlete in high school, later he became the athlete he always wanted to be, winning his share of sailboat racing regattas, including a prestigious international competition.

It takes stamina to do that, and Randy’s seemed to be inexhaustible.

“Running, biking and triathlons became my passion,” he says, “I pushed myself to do better with each competition.”

When his swimming ability was holding him back, he spent hours perfecting his stroke. Randy Oakes was never afraid to work hard for the result he wanted.

That work ethic was rewarded as he traveled from state to state, winning his age division in highly competitive triathlons.

In addition to those successes, at 62 Randy met Sam, the woman who quickly became the love of his life.

“With her by my side, I felt like I was on top of the world,” he recalls.

But his world collapsed without warning after he went all out to have a great finish in a triathlon that attracted “the best of the best.”

What started as leg pain got so bad that he had to hobble to pick up his medal. Then he needed assistance to get back to his car.

The surgeon to whom he was referred said he had a bulging disk in his back but said Randy would find immediate relief from an epidural.

Instead of being able to walk without pain as his surgeon promised, Randy couldn’t walk at all. Nor could he control his bowels or bladder.

“I had no feeling below the waist,” he says.

The bad news kept coming.

Randy had suffered a spinal cord stroke.

After two experts reviewed the MRI, he was told he would never be able to walk again.

So he went to see three more experts. They all said he would never walk again.

He and Sam were only married 17 months at the time.

Facing life as a paraplegic, he told her he would probably have to go into a nursing home.

“I told her to walk away and make a life for herself,” he says.

Sam reassured him and has remained at his side.

Randy admits there were times he prayed not to wake up again.

“Not being able to move my bowels or pass urine normally was just as devastating as not being able to walk. It was extremely difficult to find any hope,” he says.

Although every expert they consulted offered no hope, one doctor they nicknamed Dr. Hope pointed out that anyone who trained as hard as Randy had as an athlete must have the determination to accomplish amazing things.

There it was. The glimmer of hope they had longed for.

Randy was moved to the spinal cord wing of a rehab hospital where he focused on recovery.

“I knew it was going to be a long process,” he says, “but I was willing to do the work to make it happen, just as I did when I was doing my athletic training.”

After seven months of intense effort, he still couldn’t move a muscle and remained paralyzed from the waste down.

At one point would you give up?

Randy never gave up. In addition to his regular therapy, he stayed longer, trying for the slightest movement.

When physical therapists saw his extraordinary effort, they tried holding him up and moving his legs to see if any muscle memory would return.

Time and again Randy failed to stand. But he kept trying until finally, with a lot of help, he was able to remain upright.

“Just getting up on my feet again was an amazing feeling. Tears came to my eyes. For the first time I believed I might be able to walk again with braces and supports of some kind,” he recalls.

Randy’s story doesn’t include a sudden physical miracle where he can walk again. The only miracle was his gift of an indomitable spirit that would not give up.

For years, physical progress was minuscule — maybe a slight movement in a muscle. Yet, he never stopped his intense therapy.

When he could only move one leg but yearned to ride a bike again, a friend strapped his paralyzed leg onto a special bike.

“I could only go a few feet until I tired,” Randy says. But he kept trying.

After 10 years of herculean effort he now can walk short distances with leg braces and two canes.

I watched him work out with his therapist and saw firsthand his fierce commitment to recovery — no matter how long it takes.

We could all learn a lesson from Randy Oates.

When you’ve hit a wall, find a way around the wall. Above all, don’t give up.

Randy detailed his story in his book, “The Healing Begins Today.”

The memoir, available on Amazon, is a testimony to the power of will.

“I am so gratified when readers write to tell me how it inspired them in their own struggles,” Randy says.

He wants to encourage others to never give up.

Never, never give up.

Contact Pattie Mihalik at newsgirl@comcast.net.