One thing that’s a little difficult to fully understand is that many of the decisions we make today will impact us our entire life.

Take the decision to have a baby. It just doesn’t affect our life while the baby is young. Because of that child, there are so many good things that continue to shower blessings on us, even after the child is an adult.

It’s always delightful to have a new baby in the family. For me, it’s also great having children in the neighborhood.

When my daughters were babies I was so enchanted with them that I never wanted to put them down.

I read somewhere that our children are only ours on loan from God. I’ve always realized we have them for such a limited time.

I was determined to make the most of every minute with them.

I always thought my husband and I would have a big family. We both loved kids and we thought we would be like his brother’s family with five kids.

But an emergency hysterectomy wiped out that dream.

It took a long time for my family to be able to celebrate the birth of a new child. Thanks to daughter Andrea and her husband, Greg, we joyfully welcomed three new little ones to expand our family. What a blessing.

When grandchild Sophie came along her two brothers treated her like a princess. They catered to her in everything, so much so that I worried she was going to be spoiled beyond acceptance.

One example: When I asked grandson Grayson what he wanted for his birthday he said that he wanted a tennis racket. I reminded him he already had one.

“But Sophie doesn’t have one. I want it for her,” he said.

Well, I didn’t have to worry about Sophie being a spoiled brat. We are all amazed at how sweet and loving she is with everyone.

During my last birthday she used her precious vacation time to fly to Florida to see me. It’s not every kid who gives up vacation time to see her old grandmother.

Andrea knows she hit the jackpot with three loving kids, but she says she only has one regret. “I wish I would have had another one,” she says.

That surprised me.

But I hear many people say they wish they would have had a child or more children.

I’m sure you’ve seen the statistics that say having a baby is falling out of favor. The birthrate keeps going down in the U.S. as well as in much of the world.

In 2024, the U.S. birthrate reached an all-time low of 1.6 children per woman.

The number one reason is said to be money. They call it financial insecurity.

With the job market not nearly as rewarding as it once was, finding a good paying job is no longer easy.

Some young adults tell stories of having to have two jobs just to pay their bills.

It’s daunting for them to even think about adding a child. It’s simply too difficult for women to afford having a child.

And very little seems to encourage it. The high cost of housing and child care also creates a significant financial burden.

When I read that, I thought back to the difficult time my husband and I had when we had our two children.

I remember when I needed to buy a bonnet to keep the sun out of my baby’s eyes. Way back then, I could have bought one for a dollar.

We didn’t have a dollar. We had to wait for the next payday.

I remember being told not to wait until you think you can afford a child because if you did, chances were that you never would have a baby.

I remember having to pay the hospital $10 a month for our child’s delivery. My husband was a teacher, and if you think teachers’ salaries are low today, way back then it was worse.

But they were different times and some things that worked in our favor aren’t possible today.

We lived in the same town as the rest of our family so we had willing babysitters. In some important ways we were better off than today’s young couples. Many have the double whammy of having no family nearby for support and no employee benefits to help with costs.

No wonder today that couples say they couldn’t afford to have a child. And sadly, so many times the women who do have babies ends up alone, struggling to pay for child care.

Before a woman can have a baby she needs to find a stable partner. I’m told that’s harder than it used to be.

It sometimes means women are denied the opportunity to have a child. Some think they will wait until they can afford it. But often they never reach that point until it’s too late.

It’s not always just about not being able to afford it.

Some men and women simply never want to have a child after they evaluate what they want in life.

The old saying “To thy own self be true” is an important consideration.

I believe every child is a gift, but I sure do understand the complexities involved in having one.

Like many things today, it seems to be getting harder.

Tell me your thoughts.

Email Pattie Mihalik at newsgirl@comcast.net