By Pattie Mihalik

Tom, a neighbor who is greatly loved and admired by his neighbors, passed away today.

At 96, he and his wife, Ginni, were often the hosts of neighborhood wine parties.

We were all looking forward to his birthday party when sheltering in place is safely over.

Alas, it won’t happen.

The guy who has bounced back from every infirmity has gone on to his heavenly reward.

Tom and Ginni have been an inspiration to the rest of us because they taught us how to love each other through all of life’s joys and sorrows.

I did a story on them when they were celebrating their 70th wedding anniversary.

I asked what was the toughest thing they had to live through.

They both agreed it was the death of their only daughter, who was killed in a car accident.

They said they now understand how tragedy tears a couple apart and often leads to divorce.

Ginni admits it almost happened to them.

“We grieved different. Tom didn’t share his feelings, and soon he wouldn’t talk at all,” Ginni says.

Things got so insufferably distant between them that Tom said he wanted a divorce.

Ginni reminded him when he asked her to marry him she said the only way she would get married would be if it were forever, or until death parted them.

Both admit they worked their way through their problems because Ginni wouldn’t have it any other way.

It has been truly inspirational for the rest of us to watch the tender way they treat each other, especially after Tom got sick.

After heart problems, a stroke and several falls made it unsafe for Tom to walk on his own, Ginni had to keep adjusting the way she cared for him.

Doctors kept telling her she could no longer do it on her own. At 92, she had her own health problems and could no longer lift him when he fell.

For her own good, she was told, it was time to put Tom in a nursing home.

She couldn’t do it.

“I got married till death do us part, not until things got difficult,” she said.

So she stayed by his side, lovingly dealing with one health crisis after another. She sometimes admitted she didn’t know how she could continue to manage on her own. But she did.

She even managed to throw a “welcome to the neighborhood” wine party when two couples moved into the homes next to them.

Right from the start, we all knew Kirk and Lois and Arianna and Jess would be a perfect fit for our friendly neighborhood.

Those two couples taught the rest of us about another kind of love. They taught us the meaning behind “love the neighbor.”

When Ginni was trying to hire a repairman to fix the front door, Kirk told her she didn’t have to hire anyone. He would do it.

The two guys took care of everything that had to be done around Ginni’s place while their wives wore a path from their house to Ginni’s home as they made frequent trips to bring her casseroles and homemade cakes.

Just a few months ago they were what we call “perfect strangers,” but they pitched right in as if they were family.

They instructed Ginni to call them “anytime day or night” if she needed help. And she did.

Warm and friendly, the two new couples knew everyone on the block from the time they arrived.

“All it takes is walking your dog and you meet everyone,” Jeff said.

Actually, it’s their personality and attitude that draws people to them.

Sadly, Kirk’s brain cancer returned with a vengeance, and he passed away before Tom.

While she is still struggling with the sudden loss of her husband, Lois puts aside her own grief to continue helping Ginni.

Another nursing assistant from our block also continues to offer Ginni emotional and physical help.

So much is hard and downright ugly with the way coronavirus is hitting us.

We try to stay strong by thinking of our blessings. Neighbors who care about each other is a meaningful blessing.

When my neighbor Steve walked by while I was getting my mail, he asked how I was surviving. I said I was fine except for not being able to buy meat.

Steve went home and took a pack of chicken breasts from his freezer and brought it to me.

That kind of goodness sustains me.

During trying times, some remarkable people reach out to others instead of being wrapped only in their own difficulties.

We all heard the news accounts of Americans stuck on cruise ships for a month.

My friend Charles was on a Princess cruise to Chile when countries shut down their ports. Stuck at sea for weeks, things got worse for the passengers when much of the crew from Argentina was taken off the ship, leaving passengers on their own.

I would have been terrified, wrapped in my own fear, I’m sure.

Not Charles. As a fitness and dance teacher, he sprung into action, holding classes for the passengers to give them something to do.

It was a long, difficult ordeal for stranded passengers.

But the selfless actions of this fitness instructor helped them cope a bit better.

Caring about others is definite another wonderful kind of love.

Spread the love.

Contact Pattie Mihalik at newsgirl@comcast.net.