If your parents left you money in their will but your brothers and sisters weren’t given any, would you keep it all to yourself?

Or, would you share the money with your siblings?

I’m guessing most people would answer that by saying they would keep the money for themselves.

They might say keeping the money for themselves was justified because it’s what their parents wanted. Why else would they specifically leave it to them?

It certainly would be a rarefied action for someone to share money for siblings who weren’t named in the will.

The lawyer who handled a true case where the money was shared with siblings said he was stunned by that unexpected generous sharing.

“In all my years of handling estates I never saw that happen,” he said. “The opposite is usually the case - family members fight over money. They never think of sharing.”

A new friend of mine, let’s call her Betty, told me that story. It’s one she knows firsthand because she is one of the rare individuals who shared her money with her siblings.

I’ll protect the family’s identity by changing a few details, but their story is so unusual it’s worth sharing.

Betty comes from a big family with five kids in it. It was always a closely knit family where they all got along great and all did what they could to help their parents as they aged.

When her parents passed away, they left $100,000 insurance policies for the two oldest kids, namely Betty and her brother.

“Oh, no, this isn’t right and I’m sure it’s not what my parents intended,” Betty said. She and her brother told the lawyer they wanted the money split evenly among the five siblings.

She thinks what happened was her parents had intended to establish insurance policies for each of the kids. But as the family grew bigger and money got tight, there never seemed to be the extra money for three more policies.

So the money was divided equally and everyone was happy.

I’ve seen so many cases where fights over money and who gets what splits families into warring factions where the wounds never heal.

It’s been heartwarming to get to know the Betty and her siblings.

They have a closeness and love for each other that I find enviable.

When Betty’s husband passed away a few years ago, her family has kept their promise to be there for her. They live hundreds of miles away but they come often to stay with her.

One brother just spent his two-week vacation fixing up her older home. The love and caring in that family is palpable every time I see them together.

It’s clear how much they value each other.

Some think money is everything, but it’s such cold comfort compared to the warmth of a loving family. It’s obvious the two siblings gifted with insurance policies knew that when they quickly said they wanted the money divided equally among the five of them.

I see so many cases where money corrupts. Sometimes people do horrible things one would never expect from them when money is involved.

David and I had two friends we really enjoyed, and the four of us had so much fun together.

Like many marriages among seniors here in Florida, it was a second marriage for Tim and Barbara.

Sadly, they were only married a year and a half when Tim passed away. We were as jolted by Barbara’s actions when the will was read as we were when Tim passed away.

Tim left everything to Barbara but stipulated in his will that she was to keep the house but share his other assets with his two adult children.

She told the lawyer she wasn’t giving his kids anything. “I don’t have to,” she said.

The lawyer told her that while legally she didn’t have to give the kids anything because the estate was left in her name, ethically she needed to do it. She refused.

After Tim’s memorial service, his daughter asked Barbara if she could have her mother’s china and an antique table that was from her mother’s family. While those items had sentimental value for her, she didn’t think they would mean anything to Barbara.

With a house crammed full of furniture, Barbara refused to give the daughter the old dishes and table.

Yet when I invited Barbara to my house to swim, she walked in and said she was longing to have Florida furnishing like I have.

I told her it was easy to add coastal touches to any house.

“No, I’m stuck with a bunch of heavy-looking antiques I hate,” she said.

Guess who was never invited to my house again.

I’ve attended educational estate planning seminars where it is stressed we need to get our wills checked to make sure our beneficiaries are listed the way we intend.

If we want our assets shared, the will should say that. If only one beneficiary is listed, that person can legally keep it all, just as Barbara did.

As Tim’s lawyer said, there’s a difference between what’s legal and what’s ethical.

The two true stories I’ve shared illustrate that to some, family is more important than money.

To others, nothing is more important than money.

A carefully drawn will might prevent some problems after we’re gone.

Contact Pattie Mihalik at newsgirl@comcast.net.