What an interesting week it's been!

My Facebook feed has blown up over education AND football.It's a nice change of pace from my days of covering school board meetings, when only one of those subjects was guaranteed to draw a crowd. (FYI … it wasn't education.)It's also been a chaotic week in our house as we threw in the towel, admitted things weren't working out, and pulled E out of one school and moved her to another. Who would have guessed that stressing out over my kids' education could keep me awake at night way better than the coffee and No-Doz I used to eat to pull an all-nighter in college?My kids' education is probably at the top of the list of parenting decisions that I feel that I've got to get right. It's also one of the things that lately, I feel like I have no control over. Recently, as I was obsessing over my frustrations with our current school situations to a friend who is an educator, she said two things which gave me a lot more to think about.First of all, she said, "You know what your problem is, you care too much."And secondly, she said, "You do know that your kids are going to be fine no matter where they go to school."My response to the first statement was "how can one possibly care too much?" I don't want to be the parent who is continually a thorn in teachers' sides, or helicoptering over my child relentlessly, but I do want to be an active participant in my kids' education. My own education is one of the greatest gifts my parents gave me, and I am thankful for it every single day.I want my kids to know that school is their first priority. They need to excel to the best of their abilities, and I expect them to learn as much as they possibly can.I'm also here to help make that happen in any way that I can, whether it is keeping them in school supplies, or helping them with their homework, or chaperoning the Winter Social. If there is something I can do to help my kids engage and enjoy school, I want to do it. My educator friend looked at me sadly and told me that I was the rare parent who saw things that way.I have many friends who are teachers, and some of the stories I hear are truly heartbreaking. One friend smuggles extra snacks into some of her students' backpacks on Fridays because she knows they don't have a lot of food at home over the weekend.I know another teacher friend who collects outgrown uniforms because she keeps a stash in her drawer for when kids come to school in a dirty uniform. Another educator I know made arrangements for a high school student to come in and use the locker room in the morning to get washed and clean because she couldn't do it at home.In the face of those stories, I can see where me becoming apoplectic over the fact that G isn't making his cursive A's quite right can seem like a bit of overkill.Teachers, and schools in general, have to fill more and more basic needs for children, in addition to just covering the basics of education, and they are continually being raked over the coals for not measuring up.I have no doubt that there are many things wrong with our education system today, but there are a lot of things that are right. I also think the best people to improve it are the people who are in the trenches every day and already making it work to the best of their ability.Over the course of my education, I have had the privilege of attending private schools, public schools, and now, with the kids, parochial schools. Every child is different and has different needs, and as I was growing and changing, different schools worked in better ways for me than others. I see the same thing happening with my children. It's good to have choices and options, but if parents are not engaged in their child's education and working with schools to get the best possible outcome, a child's chances for success are greatly dimmed no matter what kind of school it is.Having recently gone through a stretch where I had to peel a crying child off the floor every morning, and beg and plead and bribe and cajole her to go to school every day, I have really come to appreciate how important it is that a child love and respect going to school.I realize that for many years I have been taking that attitude for granted in my children.Their old school made that magic happen for them. I'm hoping that the changes that we've made will get E back into the right mindset so that she can once again enjoy going to school. In this case, my educator friend is right, my kids will be OK no matter what. They have a strong support system, and the wonderful husband and I are committed to their success in school.I don't have the answers, but I know, in our case, we will be vigilant and engaged to whatever level we need to be to be sure that our own kids get the best education they possibly can.I do believe that education should come with choices, but I should be making that choice based on which school is the best school for my child's needs, not a "good" school over a "bad" school.Shouldn't we want that for every child in our community?Liz Pinkey is a contributing writer to the Times News. Her column appears weekly in our Saturday feature section.