By BOB URBAN

rurban@tnonline.comWay back when my family got our first television set, a black and white Philco, I'd come home from school in the afternoon and my mother would have on one of her favorite programs - Art Linkletter's House Party. The show was the forerunner to all of today's afternoon talk shows, including Oprah.Linkletter had guests, but I don't recall any of them. What I do remember, however is a segment he included every day called, "Kids say the darndest things." It was hilarious, and unscripted - funnier than anything that's on the airwaves today.Linkletter would have a half dozen youngsters sitting in a semi-circle and he'd ask them questions. The answers were spontaneous, the kids didn't have to be coached or coaxed into answering.How funny were they?Recently a loyal reader sent a segment right from Linkletter's archives that is so precious, it has to be shared with as many people as possible.See if you don't agree.It's called "Kids letters to God." I'm betting this will get your new year off to a great start.Dear God:Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones why don't you just keep the ones you got now?JaneDear God:I went to this wedding and they kissed right in church.Is that ok?NeilDear God:In bible times did they really talk that fancy?JenniferDear God:I think about you sometimes even when I'm not praying.ElliottDear God:I am Amearican. What are you?RobertDear God:Thank you for the baby brother but what I prayed for was a puppy.JoyceDear God:If you watch in church on Sunday I will show you my new shoes.Mickey D.Dear God:If we come back as sometyhing please don't let me be Jennifer Horton because I hate her.DeniseDear God:I would like to live 900 yearz like the guy in the bible.Love,ChrisDear God:If you give me genie lamp, like Alladin I, will give you anything you want except my money or my chess set.RaphaelDear God:We read Thomas Edison made light. But in Sunday School they said you did it. So I bet he stoled your idea.Sincerely,DonnaDear God:If you let the dinasor not exstinct we would not have a country. You did the right thing.JonathanDear God:Maybe Cain and Abel would not kill each so much if they had their own rooms. It works with my brother.LarryDear God:Please put another holiday between Christmas and Easter. There is nothing good in there now.Ginny