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Published January 09. 2010 09:00AM

Need some direction for the new year? Follow these 22 suggestions sent in by a reader and you can't go wrong.

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.

2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.

3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

5. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.

6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

9. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is probably not for you.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably a wise investment.

12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.

14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

17. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.

20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.


22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

I kind of liked having Christmas and New Year's fall on a Friday this year. I'm sure a lot of working people did. Having a long weekend off is always a bonus, and having two long weekends in a row just doubles the pleasure.

If it stays as cold as it has been, I won't be taking down my outside Christmas lights until mid-April, well after Easter. Come to think of it, the high winds we've been experiencing, will probably blow them down anyway.

Avatar is either one of the most unique movies ever made, or one of the most-hyped. I won't know until I see it. But I'm waiting until it comes out on CD, so I can watch it in high definition on our new big screen TV, my wife and my Christmas gift to each other this year.

Two things I never tire of over the holidays - A Charley Brown Christmas and The Christmas Story. I could watch them in July.

If Dave Argall announces Monday that he's running against Tim Holden for the 17th District U.S. House of Representatives position, as many people predict, this will be one of the most hotly contested political battles we've witnessed in this area in a long-long time.

His Eagles teammates voted Michael Vick their team's "courage award" this season. What were they thinking? I'll give Vick a courage award when he agrees to climb into the ring with the pit bulls he and his lackeys trained to fight and kill. A courage award indeed, for what, climbing out of prison and getting $2 million to participate in about 10 plays this year? Ridiculous.

And speaking of the Eagles. No one gives them much of a chance tonight against the Cowboys, after viewing last week's 24-0 debacle in Texas. But I think they have a good shot, and here's why. The Eagles are 7-0 in first round playoff games under Andy Reid. The Cowboys haven't won a playoff game since 1996. And besides, my wife's good friend Maureen Rice will be rooting her heart out for the Eagles. And that should make the difference.

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