The last thing I want to do is upset the readers of this column.
But in case you haven't heard or read about it, today is Doomsday.
Yep! At 6 p.m. today the world's going to end. We're finished, gone.
So don't cut the grass. Don't make any dinner reservations for this evening. Don't plant that camping trip. It's no use.
We're finished, done for, toast, call it what you want. No use planning a column for next week. There's not going to be anyone around to read it.