By PATTIE MIHALIK

newsgirlcomcast.netA few years back, I wrote a column about needing to believe in "Someday."I need to believe the day would come when I would get around to all my good intentions my do it "Someday" projects.I need to believe Someday I would find the time, energy and motivation to clear out the bookcases in my office. Although the bookcases are enclosed in doors, I can seldom open a door because too much stuff is jammed in there, waiting for me to get around to it Someday.Someday I'll do something about the long shelves in my garage that would nicely hold my miscellaneous stuff. They would, if they weren't filled with seashells I've collected for the past decade.The seashells are there waiting to be cleaned and sorted so they are available for the shell craft projects I do with my shell club. Even though I have thousands of my own shells, every time we have a shell project I end up using my friend's shells because mine aren't sorted.I would feel worse about that if I didn't believe I'm going to do it Someday.When I was in Pennsylvania I used snow days to do projects like that. When it snowed I did the projects I was putting off.Here in Florida, the only reason I don't get my cabinets and shelves cleaned is because I'm waiting for a snow day. Or Someday. Whichever comes first.This week, as I pondered the problem of waiting for Someday, I concluded I just have to accept the fact that clean shelves don't take precedence over enjoying the day.Projects wait because I'm too busy enjoying the fun things in life things like sitting in the water in a kayak and letting the sunshine fill me with gladness as I glide across the water.Or biking with my husband or going to the beach with my girlfriends.I'm at the age when the question I ask myself is this: If I only had a few days left, would I want to spend those days cleaning cabinets? Or would I want to spend those days enjoying life?I think the answer is obvious.When I had young children at home, if a daughter tugged at my sleeve and said she wanted me to come outside with her, I did exactly that, even if I was in the middle of a household project.I always kept in mind that my daughters' childhood would disappear all too soon. The day would come sooner than I wanted when they would no longer want me by their side to see the chipmunks in the yard or to watch them do the new trick they learned.I always knew when my daughters grew up they wouldn't remember the kitchen floors I scrubbed or the furniture I dusted. But I thought they would remember the nature walks we took and the "Dolly with the hole in her stocking" dance we did.I didn't have any trouble with priorities back then. My priority was to enjoy my time with my daughters. I didn't suffer from a guilty conscience if I didn't get a closet cleaned.Somewhere along the way I did develop a mindset that I needed to keep myself busy crossing things off my "to do list." The next day there was another to do list that I tackled.My mindset changed in retirement and not just because I now live a less hurried lifestyle. As we get older we think about time differently. We become more aware of making every day count.Two months ago we had a sudden death in our family that has made all of us more aware of the fragility of life. It's made every one of us know that if something is important to us, do it now.We stopped waiting for Someday.I'm not talking about cleaning closets. I'm talking about taking time to tell those we love how important they are to us.We've learned that if you love or especially appreciate someone, tell them now. You might never get the chance if you wait for someday.I'm sure that was the motivation behind my daughter Andrea's priceless Mother's Day gift to me. Not normally openly sentimental, she surprised me by writing a long letter telling me all the things she appreciates about me, going back to her childhood adventures with me.No reward, no award and no material thing could ever mean as much to me as that letter.She told me about another woman who also wrote a letter like that to her mother. Before she could mail it, she had a call saying her mother had passed away.The lesson: Don't wait for Someday.Making time for family and loved ones cannot wait.Building precious memories with your children cannot wait.Healing a rift or estranged relationship cannot wait for Someday.Reaching out to someone who could use an encouraging word cannot wait.If someone made your day, tell them.If someone lights up your life, tell them.If there's someone you've been meaning to call, don't wait for Someday.Things like crammed closets and jammed shelves can wait because, at the end of life, no one ever wishes she had cleaned more closets.But some things should never wait for the Someday that may never arrive.