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Where we live: Titanic II — this idea just doesn’t hold water

Published October 27. 2018 06:45AM


I’ve been on a couple cruises and had a great time.

However, there isn’t a chance in you know where that you’re going to get me on the Titanic II.

Clive Palmer, an Australian businessman, has plans to rebuild the entire Titanic, re-creating the original ship’s floor plan and bringing along the exact same number of passengers and crew.

About the only difference is that they plan on having the proper number of lifeboats this time around.

This isn’t exactly my field, but not sure I would market it as “the exact same route.”

The ship will launch from Dubai in 2022, head to Singapore and back, making the Southampton to New York voyage. True to the original ship, it even comes with a class divide. The rich people drink up top, while my room would be located down in the underbelly.

The Titanic II will carry 2,400 passengers and 900 crew members, pretty close to the exact number of the 1912 version.

In case you forgot, let me share some other details about that first trip. The ship hit an iceberg and 1,500 people died.

Do you want some bad news about this version? The director’s last name is Mensink. Really, you couldn’t find anyone else?

I kind of applaud the “if at first you don’t succeed, try again” attitude, but someone has way too much time on their hands.

Or, maybe they’re banking on global warming having melted all the icebergs.

In all seriousness, I’m sure these passengers will be much better off as 21st century technology will keep them safe, but I did enjoy reading reaction to the news.

A Today Show poll showed that 65 percent of people said they would not board a ship called Titanic II.

When the news broke on social media this week, there were a whole lot of hard passes, much like I’m giving in this column.

Of note were some tweets predicting the modern-day scene should this ship meet a similar fate.

One image showed multiple passengers in the water holding up cellphones to film the ship going down. It’s funny and it’s not, all at the same time.

The “” Twitter account tweeted, “the word you’re looking for is foreshadowing.”

Others shared rumors that this ship will have doors buoyant enough to hold two people.

My advice to anyone getting on the ship, shell out some dollars for those first-class tickets if you want to guarantee yourself a spot on the lifeboats.

All that has to happen now is for the cruise line to book Celine Dion as the on-board entertainment for the week.


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