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Counting the days

Published January 05. 2013 09:02AM

Once again the calendars return to January and the year jumps forward another digit. This means a few days or weeks of writing the wrong year on checks, letters and other forms of communication. It also signals the end of the Christmas season and the long stretch of No Man's Land for holidays until Memorial Day. Granted there are holidays all year long, but most of the major ones seem to lay in a short period of the year.

From January to July, we have New Year's Day, then almost five months until Memorial Day. Once we reach Memorial Day, it is like crossing the crest of a mountain and the holidays come at a maddening pace. In a little over a month is Independence Day. About two months later is Labor Day followed in a little less than three months by Thanksgiving at which point we reach maximum velocity since only four weeks later is Christmas and in one week the cycle starts again at New Year's Day.

Being on the other side of New Year's Day, all of those holidays once again seem a long way from here. Granted there are minor holidays in between unless you are in the public sector then some of those days are vacation days as well. For example, Martin Luther King Day, President's Day and sometimes Easter are holidays that some companies offer as well as Columbus Day. The Federal government offers almost all of these holidays plus Flag Day.

Perhaps we need a national holiday of some significance between January and May to even things out that is not religious but more universal. Our calendar is full of national days and weeks. There is a designated day for practically anything or interest one can suggest. There is a website called where one can find a national day for practically any interest.

A casual inspection of March and April where our dearth of a national holiday turns up some interesting choices. Of course there is St. Patrick's Day but one can argue that is a holiday limited to an ethnic group even though it is celebrated as a day of carousing by almost everyone. How about National Goof Off Day on March 22nd? That seems like a natural for a holiday. Or maybe the next day which is National Miss day referring to an asteroid that missed the Earth in 1989 on that day by a mere 500,000 miles. There's also Pi Day which is March 14th. Coincidentally this is shaping up to be one of those math maniac days because in 2015, the date will match the value 3.141592653 or 3/14/15 at 9:26:53 AM. Pi is important because almost everything relies on it. March 28th could be an interesting holiday since it is National Weed Appreciation Day, the pests not pot. Who would have thought weeds would have their own day? Of course dandelion is mighty tasty.

Moving on to April we have some good alternatives for holidays as well. April 6th is Walk to Work Day which might as well be a holiday since most of us live so far from where we work it would take the whole day to commute there. On the bright side the number of car accidents that day would probably plummet. April 15th might make a good national holiday. While most of us know it as Tax Day, it actually has another moniker, That Sucks Day. Besides the fact that the IRS is a major contributor to that sentiment other downers on that day include the sinking of the Titanic and the death of Abraham Lincoln. Come to think of it, while the day sounds interesting in name it probably isn't holiday material. The day before has possiblities, National Look Up At the Sky day on April 14th. This is just a day to stare at the sky and appreciate its beauty provided it isn't gray, cloudy and raining. My favorite contender is April 25th, National Hug a Plumber Day. Plumbers are one of the few people that are a godsend when things go south and I cannot count the number of times a plumber has bailed me out in one way or another.

Needless to say, there are just a few of the candidates. Perusing the website reveals that there is practically a designation for almost every day of the year. If we were to celebrate them all with time off then nothing would get done, but we would all have a great deal of fun. Considering many of them were passed by Congress, that might explain why nothing gets done in Washington. They are too busy celebrating crazy national holidays. Perhaps we could get them to pass a holiday like National Spend What you Earn Day or National Do Something Constructive Day. That would be one holiday I would be glad to work.

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