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Caylee's letter to Mom Casey

Published July 16. 2011 09:02AM

Hi Mommy. It's me, Caylee.

I'm up here in heaven, a beautiful place. I'm with someone named God. He says He's the father of a man named Jesus.

I don't really understand all of that because I left Earth long before I knew anyone named Jesus. I suppose I would've gotten to know Jesus in time. But you didn't give me a chance. For some reason, you didn't want me to be with you. I still don't understand why.

I really didn't do anything to hurt anyone. I was just a little girl who liked to sing 'You Are My Sunshine.'

Of course, I put all of my trust in you because that's what little kids do. We trust our parents because they're the ones who brought us into the world and we instinctively know they'll protect us. But you were different. You didn't seem interested in me. When Gram and Pop-Pop were watching, or others, you played with me and we had fun. But most times, you didn't want me to be around.

You wanted to forget about me so that you could party with grown-ups. You wanted to dance, sing and drink. It wouldn't have bothered me much except that you kept me in the car. It was lonely in the car, Mommy. It was even worse in the trunk, so hot and uncomfortable. It make me choke.Then you'd put chemicals at my nose and mouth and make me breathe it in. It made my head spin and I'd fall asleep. I didn't want to sleep. I wanted to be with you.

The angels here in heaven told me it was chloroform you gave me, a harsh drug. I was way too young to understand what was happening. Little girls aren't supposed to know about chloroform. The only thing we're supposed to know is love, especially how to love our mother.

And those pills you gave me - Xanax. Well, they made me dizzy. Between the chloroform and those pills, it just seemed you didn't want me to be with you. That hurt me lots, Mommy. Little girls have feelings, too.

So one time when you put me to sleep, I didn't wake up. I saw angels flying above me and decided to go with them. They said they'd take me to Someone who'd appreciate me. They led me to a place called heaven and it's more wonderful than anything I could imagine. I'm happy to be with others like me. On Earth, there are so many children who aren't treated good, and all of us end up in this special place above the clouds.

Despite all, Mommy, I miss you. I'm sorry to learn that everyone has turned against you for what you've done.

I'm also sorry that you didn't want me to be with you. God said He gave me to you to make your life more fulfilling, and to make the world a better place. You decided you'd rather have excitement, dancing and partying with boyfriends.

But why? I didn't do anything wrong. I just wanted to be the best little daughter in the world. I was only two - and you didn't give me a chance. I tried hard to be the perfect daughter but you didn't want to be my Mommy.

Anyway, God says He isn't happy with the decisions you've been making. I don't know what that means. But it doesn't sound good. Maybe it means He won't invite you to heaven. That would be a shame because heaven is a wonderful place. Everyone needs to come to heaven.

I'm not sure what will happen next for either one of us. I will listen to whatever God tells me. I'll trust in Him in the same way I trusted you. But this time I'll hope for a better outcome. As for you, I don't know who you're listening to. But it isn't God.

Bye-bye Mom Casey. I only wanted for you to love me.

Your daughter, Caylee.

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