I come not to bury Tom Corbett, but to praise him! What else can you say about a governor who wants to help those misguided property owner's who had the audacity to say that their shale gas drilling company's are "skimming off" their royalty checks?
Ol' Tom wants to help them "understand" their contracts better. How can you blame those poor, cash strapped companies for trying to recoup funds for cleaning up hazardous spills and gas explosions? It's not their fault! The nerve of those people. What's a little contaminated water? They won't miss a couple of bucks; come on!
And wasn't it nice of him to file that lawsuit against the NCAA, without burdening anyone by getting consent, and not troubling the Commonwealth's own attorneys, who are already on the payroll. So it cost a few measly millions by hiring a Philadelphia law firm. Hey, it kept some poor lawyers from being out of work. What? Frivolous? Without merit? Aren't you just nitpicking? So what if he's up for re-election!
Look what he's been doing. Trying to raise funds for our kids by selling off those nasty liquor stores, and increasing the cost of buying a license, so that only big powerful box stores can afford them, thereby monopolizing booze. Just don't believe those rumors of Tommy and his pals, becoming board members and executives for some of these companies once they're done with public service.
There's not one bit of truth in it. So what, if the big distilleries and breweries are behind this supposed scheme? They need money too! Don't they?
And that lottery sell-off to a foreign entity. He was only trying to do our seniors a favor, as well as help a teacher's union, which happened to be the major stockholder of Camelot Group. Yeah, I know they were Canadian, but they are teachers! Our teacher's? They'll find jobs. Don't they always?
And stop trying to connect the $600,000 campaign donation from the Second-Mile, to the prolonging of the Jerry Sandusky investigation. What do you want one state cop to do? He's was swamped for three years. Yeah, I know it all came out after the election. But did anyone ask why it took so long for a woman reporter from the Harrisburg Patriot to finally track down the story? What was she doing all that time?
Reneging on the state's contribution to it's employee's pension plans and throwing them into risky 401(k) plans! That will teach them for opposing him in the last gubernatorial election. Don't listen to all that talk about these private investment companies, rubbing their hands, anxious to get a hold of that steady stream of "fees and expenses." Ol' Tom means well. Do I hear "Board of Directorship," in the future? He deserves it, after what he's been through.
And how about that upstart Attorney General, Kathleen Kane? The nerve of her citing law in preventing the lottery sale. And how about her investigating her predessesor's handling of the Sandusky investigation? Oh, Ol' Tom used to be the A.G. at one time. Sour grapes to me! You don't think she'll actually uncover something, do you? Like the sudden disappearance of the Centre Co. DA?
With all this hype of selling booze licenses and trying to promote lottery gambling and squeezing money from working families; it reminds me of a nice little fellow who used to live in Chicago during the Roaring Twenties. He too, said he was a "public servant" of sorts. Now what was his name? Oh well, it will come to me later.
I'm sure Mr. Corbett was misquoted when he spoke of those lazy bums milking unemployment benefits. Why should they work and try to gain medical benefits for their families? Why should they work and contribute to thier S.S. insurance for the future. Heck it's not like 26 weeks will last forever. They'll luck out and land a job when their checks run out. No worries.
And those skilled-trades people who knowingly apply for jobs, and fail drug tests. That's why those poor manufacturer's can't fill jobs. Not because people are desperate for work and refuse to do highly skilled jobs for cheap laborers rates. You'll see. Sooner or later they'll sober up and come crawling back and begging. The ingrates. Tom knows, Tom knows.
Well, I don't want to go to overboard with my praise. Before you know it, he'll read this and get a swelled head.
I just hope everyone gets the picture and remembers our "pal" in the next gubernatorial election. The poor bugger, he needs your help.
Al Capone. That's it! Al Capone. I knew I'd remember!